Hurt in dating
I would’ve learned to trust my own instincts and realized that my initial reactions to these toxic ideas was the right response, which was that controlling another woman, or trying to control any other human being, was wrong and menacing.
The thought process was that women are always dealing with men who are “pussies,” so when a cocky guy comes along, it’s a welcome surprise.
I would’ve been able to love myself for who I was instead of trying to fit into some mold that others created for me.
I wouldn’t have beaten myself up so much for not wanting to control other women.
His routine concluded with his hypothesizing that since women were “crazy,” they needed a good man to be the objective reasonable one in the relationship.
The implication here was that women were damsels in distress and overly emotional beings that had no control over their faculties. “You gotta man up because girls need you to take care of them.”Unbeknownst to me, there were several girls who had feelings for me those junior high years, but I ignored them because they didn’t align with the narratives that I’d internalized. She repeatedly told me that she didn’t care about my lack of masculinity, but it was her word against all of my friends’.
In early 2015, Robin came out as transgender woman and has written about her firsthand experiences ever since.
If your man says he can't imagine living with anyone, believe him. Only you can dissipate joy through anger or resentment. Keep a gratitude journal and write out at least four little joys that you experience each day with friends, with family, with your partner.It was an easy narrative for me to believe because it was in sync with old television sitcoms.The most common staple of these programs was the male protagonist who tried to win a woman’s affection for years, and eventually, as a “reward,” she caves in and begins dating him. This was real life, and in her mind, I was an obsessive stranger she barely knew. How easy it is to be grateful during happy moments, but what about those that make us feel sad?
As I was thinking about this situation, wanting my own children to take a positive approach to life, quite unexpectedly the neighbor phoned to say, "You know, maybe I spoke out of turn. It's a chance and she should enjoy the happy moments." Gratitude in good times or bad When we feel happy, safe, protected, and loved—we are grateful.
Dismantling these old ideas was extraordinarily difficult since I had been indoctrinated with them at such a young age, but I realize now that the people bestowing these ideas were going off false information provided to them by the misogynistic society we live in.